Dear Gil,



According to the Scriptures, family relations follow the father.

This is the reason that Abraham’s mother is not mentioned in the Scriptures, just as many women are not mentioned in the Scriptures.



But in later generations a change took place — as many changes took place — and family relationships were defined as following the mother. So as not to seem to be violating what is written in the Torah, they gave a questionable exegesis: “You shall not intermarry with them: do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, for they will turn your sons away from Me to worship other gods, and the Lord’s anger will blaze forth against you and He will promptly wipe you out (Deuteronomy 7:3-4).The Sages discussed why it specifically says “turn your sons” and not your daughters. They said that this means that when the son marries a foreigner, there is a “turning away,” a disconnection from Jewish family relationships: “R’ Yochanan, quoting R’ Shimon the son of Yochai, quoted the Scriptures: your son from a Jewish woman is called your son, but your son from an idolater is not called your son, it is called hers” (Kiddushin 68b).



A discussion of this topic is found in the midrash: Yaakov, a man of the village Navorai taught is Tzur: One is permitted to circumcise the son of an idolatrous woman on the Sabbath if the father is a Jew. ‘who were registered by the clans of their paternal houses’ (Numbers 1:18) — a paternal house is called a family, a maternal house is not called a family. Rabbi Chaggai told him ‘You have not taught well…as is written (Ezra 10:3) ‘Now, then let us make a covenant with our G-d to expel all these women and those who have been born to them.’ R’ Yaakov answered him that one does not bring proof from Ezra, only from the Pentateuch. Rabbi Chaggai answered that this is from the Torah [via Rabbi Shimon the son of Yochai’s questionable interpretation], ‘for they will turn your sons away from Me… your son from a Jewish woman is called your son, but your son from an idolater is not called your son, it is called hers” (Bereshit Rabbah [Vilna] parasha 7).



P.S. Why do you find it important to know who the mother of Abraham was? The author of the Torah didn’t think it was an important detail to note.



Sincerely,



Daat Emet

Dear Shai,



We talk of the Scriptures and you bring us questionable traditions reflecting the Sages’ imaginations, though they treat their own words as though they had been handed down from Sinai. (We have found no source for your words — please send us the reference.)

Please note, Shai, that even Chazal — whose words you in your innocence believe, as though they had come from Sinai — supposed that in the Scriptures families were attributed to the fathers. Thus, too, did R’ Yaakov think, as we related in our answer: “‘Who were registered by the clans of their paternal houses’ (Numbers 1:18) — a paternal house is called a family, a maternal house is not called a family.”



Sincerely,



Daat Emet